03 September 2009

Cars can make you appear younger - or older.

Did you know a car can affect how old you look?  I didn't.  Apparently somebody, somewhere did a study.  Probably grant funded at that.  Why can't I think of this kind of stuff??

In any event I managed to take 19 years off my real age by driving a 2001 Nissan Xterra.

 
it'll make you look 28

The Xterra "casts a rugged strong look, like a weathered face that has snowboarded down many mountains."  The "age" of someone driving an Xterra?  28.  Perhaps it's really 20, but that whole "snowboarded down many mountains" thing may have "weathered" the face a bit too much.  In any event for a week or so, I went from 47 to 28.

However, after driving the Xterra to Wyoming and back, it became very obvious to me that I was not 28, and I didn't have the body of a 28 year old, and I didn't like bouncing down the road like a ping pong ball.  Sorry, it may be rugged and tough and all that, but it sure isn't comfortable on 47 year old bones.  Not to mention I like my cars to actually have power.  When I push on the accelerator, it should accelerate.  The Xterra just made a lot of noise to give you the impression you were actually moving.  Maybe that's their way of making it "fuel efficient."

So, I traded the Xterra in and gained six years back.  I bought a 2007 Jeep Grand Cherokee Limited.

 this one makes you look 34


This particular car sets my age at 34.  Not bad, actually.  I could deal with being 34 again.  Although, there's a bunch of stuff that's happened in the past 13 years, I'd rather not repeat, so I'll just settle for the "illusion" of being 34.  They didn't offer any super exciting description of Grand Cherokees.  Guess they aren't "weathered" or "rugged" or whatever.  It was described as "polished."  I can do polished.  Polished is good.  Polished is mature.  Polished is classy.

01 September 2009

can't help it... I just gotta do this

Reading the news this morning I happened upon a headline that read, "Japanese men battle epic loneliness by fostering intense relationships, and romance, with stuffed pillows representing teenage girls." Apparently these men (and some women) have all consuming relationships with "figurines fashioned after popular anime characters."

Gee, makes you wonder why Japanese men are battling "epic loneliness," doesn't it? Me, I don't wonder at all.



This lead me to another story which I found myself laughing out loud while reading. Good thing the boss man was off at a meeting; he would have thought I'd lost my marbles.

Again.

"A 22-year-old Central Kitsap man who was allegedly 'begging for a fight,' Tuesday night got one — and a trip to the Kitsap County jail.


'Rocks began to rain down,' on five people gathered behind the TJ Maxx Store on Silverdale Way sometime around 7:40 p.m., according to Kitsap County Sheriff’s reports.


The 22-year-old man emerged as the thrower and told the group, who ranged in age from 15 to 50, that he was preparing for the Ultimate Fighting Championship and 'he needed to practice getting knocked out so he could prepare,' deputies wrote.


Though the group asked the man to leave, he allegedly 'sucker punched,' a 21-year-old and a fight broke out. The 22-year-old eventually pulled a pocket knife, deputies wrote, and swung it at the 21-year-old before he lost control of the weapon.


The 22-year-old told a deputy investigating the incident that he’d never been in a fight before.


Then a 15-year-old boy who had been among the group getting pelted by rocks walked up. The 22-year 'immediately began approaching,' the boy 'in an aggressive manner.' The deputy intervened and began to wrestle with the 22-year-old, eventually taking him to the ground before other deputies arrived.


The man was booked into the Kitsap County jail on suspicion of second-degree assault and resisting arrest. Deputies found a knife in one of his pockets. Bail was set at $160,000. Kitsap Sun 12 Aug. 2009


I admit in my youth, I did some pretty stooopid things, but nothing quite that moronic.


Admittedly the people on the receiving end of this man's stupidity probably didn't find it quite as funny as I do. I bet they will one day. I hope so anyway.


Kinda wonder what will become of Future Ultimate Championship Fighting Dude...